


no one wanted this but im gay and tired so HERE

by threecheersfortheblackparade



Category: Cobra Starship, Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, The Academy Is...
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reality Show, Crack Treated Seriously, Gay, Gen, lowkey bitter i couldnt figure out how to put mikey way in, the world is gay, this is so fuckin bad-, yes ik its my fic but sTILL
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:27:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27822991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/threecheersfortheblackparade/pseuds/threecheersfortheblackparade
Summary: pls be nice to me this is stupid but idc
Kudos: 2





	no one wanted this but im gay and tired so HERE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pls be nice to me this is stupid but idc

“And...action!”

“Hi,um, i’m Gerard Way, i use he/they pronouns, i’m 26 and i’m an art student from london.”

"Cut!"

* * *

“Hi, im Frank Iero, and im a 24 year old baker from liverpool”

"Cut!"

* * *

“Ray toro, 26, and i teach music at a secondary school in Hampshire”

"Cut!"

* * *

“The names gabe sporta, im 25 and im a bartender from london”

"Cut!"

* * *

“Uhh hi, im william beckett, im 23 and im a barista in sheffield”

"And....cut!"

* * *

Pete watched as the five contestants trailed in, all clutching steaming cups of starbucks like a lifeline. He glanced down at the clipboard, whilst from behind him, patrick gestured for them to sit down. 

“So.” He clapped his hands together once, and then nervously grinned. “Welcome to your home for the next few weeks I guess. All contact with the outside world hereafter is prohibited, unless we give you permission, although you’ll be allowed to phone home every wednesday, between 6 and 7 pm.”

“Its like fuckin boot camp” He heard one of them- the short one, in a black flag shirt- whisper to the guy wearing iron maiden merch. Iron-maiden-guy smirked. 

“You’ll have cameras following you around for most of the time- obviously, certain areas are out of bounds, and we won’t film after certain hours unless necessary. Um. Since we’re gonna be knowing each other, im pete and this is patrick-”. Patrick gave a small wave. “-And, among other things, we’re basically here to help you out, so any questions or um. Yeah.”

Thankfully, patrick stepped forward, and took over clearing the details. The questions included the sensible- “how will we get food and shit?” “the team will restock the food every week, and you can request for certain food items and the like”[1], the weird- “is there a hairdryer? I kinda need a hairdryer?” “yeah i think so”[2] and the downright vulgar-  “will the cameras be watching when we jerk off?” “dude, what the actual fuck”[3]. Eventually, after an instruction to get to know each other better, they were let out and hurriedly entered the house.

* * *

The five of them crowded into the living room, their suitcases having been quickly abandoned in the hallway. Horrendous Fashion Sense (he had a purple hoodie for fucks sake-) draped himself across one of the black armchairs; Iron Maiden Merch and Black Flag Shirt sat together on the couch; Probably-Not-A-Vampire was slouched on the floor, whilst Shampoo Advert Giraffe lounged next to them. They all sat there in silence- apart from Black Flag Shirt, who was humming something under his breath- until, finally, someone cracked.

“Urgh, okay,  _ fine _ . Tell me your names, motherfuckers.”

“Huh?”

“ _ Names _ , dude. If we’re gonna be here for shit knows how long, we’re probably gonna have to learn each other's names.”

“Uhhh-”

“Dude, unlike  _ you _ , i’m not a vampire, i dont bite.” Black-Flag-Shirt sighed impatiently. “ _ Fine _ , ill go first. Im frank. Now-” he pointed at the guy sitting next to him. “-your turn.”

* * *

They continued talking for quite a while, saying everything and nothing and just getting to know each other, really. About an hour in, someone bought them a chinese, which led to a heated discussion over the superiority of different takeaways. Ray, Frank and Gerard had quite a similar music taste, whilst william and gabe had the same sense of humour; william and gerard found they both had a weird obsession with slightly pretentious poetry and britpop, and the other three liked bad 80s films; and they all seemed to agree on comics, bad sci fi and having an unnatural love of pasta.

* * *

A few minutes after eleven, a rather tired looking pete instructed them to (in his words) “fucking get [their] sorry asses to sleep.” He dumped a handful of keys on the kitchen counter, before bidding them goodnight, and leaving.

Gabe lunged for them at the same time as frank. The ‘fight’ was incredibly short lived due to the fact that gabes arms were longer, and so no-one was really surprised when he triumphantly held up the keys, and gleefully distributed them.[5]

“Gerard...and…...frank!-” he gave an exaggerated wink, to which he earnt a “fuck you bitch” from gerard and a half-hearted shrug from frank. “-and then ray-” He chucked the keys at the guy in question, who only just managed to doge them. “-which leaves….me and beckett-” Gabe leered at william, which was answered with the customary “fuck off”. 

And then, albeit incredibly awkwardly, they left for their rooms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 11via the guy who he was pretty sure was a vampire. Or gay. Probably both. the motherfucker was even wearing a CAPE-[return to text]  
> 22courtesy of the guy pete had mentally labeled ‘shampoo-advert giraffe’ [return to text]  
> 33from the tall one with a frankly horrendous fashion sense. At least he wasn’t straight[4],[return to text]  
> 44and no, he wasn’t assuming sexualities; generally speaking, in pete’s experience, straight people didnt come in wearing a bi pride flag, nor did they have a (tacky, probably stick on fake) tattoo saying ‘my sexuality is yes’[return to text]  
> 55each person was sharing a room with another, with the exception of ray, who was allowed his own room[6][return to text]  
> 66william would have been jealous, but the only reason the guy got his own room was because no-one else wanted to sleep in the attic. They’d all seen enough shiity horror films to know that, if anyone was gonna die first, it would be the dude in the attic. (Gerard gave him a small head pat in commiseration for being the first hypothetical victim). [return to text]
> 
> pls comment or kudos if you enjoyed :)


End file.
